Footnote to a Spanish Keyboard

I don't know if I hate the French Keyboard or the Spanish keyboard more. In France (and Belgium and likely countless places), they use keyboards that don't folow Qwerty. It's awerty or something. Like the old keyboards from elementary school kids would switch the keys around on, except the A in the wrong position actually types and glory be you're doing important stuff on the internet and not programming infinite loops in basic for kicks. So half the time we paid for WORLD WIDE WEBBIN on this continent was spent deleting the typo that would not be so on were we graced with an American keyboard. But we got used to it after awhile, and by the time we were in Spain we were pressing the wrong keys all over again, because you see, in Spain, keyboards make sense again. Except for how awesomely in reach these characters are: ñ ªº€Ç?¡. Some don't even require the shift button! But the Spanish keyboard is devious because the apostrophe key, while in the same place as on the American keyboard, is a different, uglier apostrope, the ´ instead of the ', and i've been using it all along and I hate the way it looks on my blog. At least it's completely obvious that I have to be careful with a French keyboard. Spanish keyboards have a false sense of security because if you squint hard enough, they look just like American keyboards. And my fingers respond by thinking the vertical apostrophe, straight and ferocious as an attacking ferret, is in the place it should be, but it's not, it's by the zero in the number row, all the way up there near keyboard heaven(which is where the blessed function keys live their eternal lives peacefully and idly), and just far enough that it hurts my ring finger to reach for it, but not physically, only emotionally, because my finger knows that this friend of mine, my friend that is always there to help me when I need some contraction, is in someplace unfamiliar, tricked out of its proper place by this Spanish keyboard, a keyboard that only knows deceit and treachery.